Dogs are pack animals, which makes them instinctually, natural followers. Dogs are wired to be where the rest of the pack is. As the pet parent/pack leader of your pet, your dog sees you as their source of protection, direction, affection, and provision, so wherever you go, it's where they want to be. This is an instinctual behavior. They don't want to be left alone while the rest of the pack migrates from one room to another; they can't help it because it's unnatural for them not to go where the pack leader and pack go. It goes against their instincts not to follow.
Because they are wired to be part of a pack, whenever we create distance from our dogs, they will become curious about what we are doing or where we are going. Are we going to let them out in the backyard, or are we going to the kitchen for food, or they may feel anxiety if they sense that their human will leave home.
The Need For Distance
Our dogs will often anticipate us moving from room to room or upstairs to downstairs so that they may run out ahead of us, not to be left behind. Whether they are following or shooting out ahead of us, it can be annoying, or it can be hazardous, like, for example, if we are carrying a child down the stairs or groceries into the kitchen. Therefore it would benefit us if we could create space between them and ourselves when we want some alone time or when we need to get something done without them being all over us. Plus, it would help them learn how to be more confident, calm, and ok with being apart from us, especially when we have no choice but to leave them home alone like when we have to go to work or run errands.
How To Create Consistent Distance
So now that you know that your dog doesn't follow you everywhere just because she loves you, but because it's ingrained in her DNA, you can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that you can actually do something about it.
Even though the instinct to follow is very strong, we can use our dogs' intelligence and their loyal desire to please us to create distance.
Practice leading your dog into a sit position, having them sit in a specific area or on a dog bed, placemat, or near the steps of your staircase (if going up or down).
Give your dog a stay command, but make sure that you are not communicating only verbally, but with your body language releasing a commanding presence. Your energy should be calm and confident. Give the command and walk away from them without hesitation.
If your dog tries following, use your body language and commanding but calm, confident energy to back your dog up and follow through until your dog gets into a sit or lay down position again. Then proceed to go into the area of your choice while they wait.
Be patient and consistent. You may have to start with baby steps, just going as far as a few feet and return to your dog and reward her for the few feet she gave you. Continue increasing the distance until you create the time and distance from them that you desire.
You can use treats, affection, and praise to reward your pet for waiting for your return. This will leave an imprint in their minds that they performed the correct behavior; if you have a dog that gets overexcited with exuberant praise, practice giving the praise at a calmer energy level.
Some of us enjoy our dogs following us around and enjoy their company in the bathroom, but we don't want it to happen all the time. The good news is, we can train them to follow when we invite them. We need to make sure we give clear communication, but we can make them stop and wait in one room, go into the next, and as a reward for waiting, we could release them to come to join us.
Try practicing times of wait and return, and wait and come when called, in specific areas of your home where and when you don't want them to follow. You will start to notice your dog stop and look to see what you want them to do instead of just rushing after you.
Create a habit of often making your dogs wait as you Intentionally go up and down the stairs with your child without your dog racing through the stairs with you. Randomly go to the kitchen to grab a snack while your dog waits in the living room etc. Be consistent, and soon you will be on your way to having bathroom breaks without your pet staring into your face. LOL!
~Joseph Ojeda, The Pet Pastor
Owner of Pawsitive Pet Balance, LLC
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